Showing posts with label cookies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cookies. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Double Chocolate Lovehandles

Have you ever had one of those days (okay, fine, months) when all you want to do is ravenously devour all forms of chocolate? Do you ever have those mornings  when you weigh yourself and swear off all food for the next seven days in order to get back down to your normal weight? Well, my friends, I have those months and mornings all the time. Everyday, in fact.

As you may have noticed by now, I simply adore chocolate... especially brownies. The problem with brownies, though, is that each batch only makes about 16 squares, thereby forcing you to consume a portion of cellulite-in-the-making that may be satisfying to the taste buds, but not to your pants, which barely even button when laying down on your bed, sucking in your stomach, by the way. That's why I was determined to make something that tasted like a brownie, but was only a portion of the size. A smaller portion, to be exact.

The brownie cookie. I won't tell you that I consumed fewer calories than I would have had I made real brownies, but I will tell you that every delicious bite was totally worth it. I basically subsisted off these and salty ghetto noodles during the recent snow storm, but ended giving away two dozen to my gracious neighbors who helped me to dig my car out from behind a five-foot snow bank. True story, my friends. It's a darn good thing I gave them away, too because after consuming over a dozen on my own, I was beginning to wonder if I had ANY self-control. I mean seriously-- what girl eats a dozen cookies when she has the ability to sip on an avocado smoothie before it rots in a non-working fridge? A single girl who doesn't have anyone to look sexy for, that's who.

I didn't take cookies because I forgot. So sorry to have inconvenienced you.

Anyway, let's go on, shall we? These cookies are really delicious, but really rich, so watch out now! I tried these when they were warm (against my better judgement because I'm not a fan of warm cookies), and thought they were icky. Once I let them solidify, though, I decided that they were as tasty as can be and definitely blog-worthy. So what are you waiting for? Make 'em!

One last thing... I should warn you that the dough is effing amazing. I actually reserved a container of raw dough for snacking on later. A wise decision.

Ingredients:
2/3 cup unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups brown sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 cups flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 cups chocolate chips

Method:
1. Preheat oven to 375'.

2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter and brown sugar. Incorporate eggs and vanilla.

3. In another bowl, sift together flour, baking powder, salt, and baking soda.

4. Slowly add the dry ingredients to the wet. Add chocolate chips. Taste the dough. It's so delicious, right?

5. Drop by tablespoonfuls onto ungreased cookie sheets and bake for 10-12 minutes. I say 10-12, but mine definitely took 12 minutes.

6. Allow to cool slightly before moving to cooling racks. I always store my cookies in the fridge to extend their shelf life. It works amazingly well.

Yield: 4 dozen Pin It

Monday, February 4, 2013

Eat Your Hips Off Double Chocolate Clusters

"What the fuck? You're asking me to eat my hips off?" No, I'm asking you to make cookies that are made with ingredients that aren't bad for you. In fact, these are probably a good indulgent "diet snack" for you to stock your cookie jar with. Jeesha kapeesha!

These cookies are awesome! They're soft, smooth (not gritty in the least), and best of all, super flavorful! They're made with whole wheat flour, oats, and a bit o' olive oil. See what I mean? I'm willing to bet these dream clouds contain fewer than 100 calories each. It's a damn good thing, too, because I seriously ate six of them over the weekend. And yet I still managed to step on the scale this morning and see that my weight is only 1.6 pounds from where I'm comfortable, and down 1.8 pounds from the week before. Score!

This is a really easy recipe that should be fool-proof. The biggest problem I had was keeping my fingers out of the bowl and away from my mouth. I wish I could wear this dough as lipstick. That may look weird, though, right? It may not complement my skin tone.

Ingredients:
6 tbsp butter, softened in such a way that... nevermind.
2 tbsp olive oil (of course if don't have olive oil, you can just use more butter)
1 egg
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
3 tbsp cocoa powder
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 1/4 cup oats (I always use old fashioned)
1/2 cup-ish chocolate chips

Method:
1. Preheat oven to 350'.

2. In a large bowl, combine all of your wet ingredients.

3. In a small bowl, combine all dry ingredients, less chocolate chips.

4. Slowly incorporate dry ingredients into wet. Use a hand mixer and grind the oats ever so slightly. You don't have to do it this way, but that's how I did mine, and they were fabulous! And I mean f-a-b-o-l-o-u-s. BTW, I love this song. I know, it's a shocker considering my main musical squeeze tends to be David Crowder. But I digress.

5. Stir in chocolate chips.

6. Drop rounded teaspoonfuls of dough onto ungreased cookie sheet.

7. Bake for 8-10 minutes. You won't be able to tell when these are browned, so just use your best judgement. Allow to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before moving to cooling racks.


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Friday, January 18, 2013

Almond Flour Triple Cs

Okay, so I suppose I lied about only cooking and baking food items with ingredients that are found in an ordinary kitchen, as the cookie recipe that I will soon unveil requires the use of  almond meal. Now, almond meal isn't so uncommon, but it also isn't considered a staple in the average American household.

The other day, I had the brilliant idea to milk a bunch of almonds in order to save money on the packaged stuff at the market. As it turns out, if you make your own almond milk, you'll undoubtedly be left with a crap-ton of almond meal. As I am somewhat like a Native American in that I try to use "every part of the buffalo" I could not let the byproduct of my milk go to waste. I did some googling and realized that I could almost use the almond meal like wheat flour. No kidding, huh?

This is how the almond flour chocolate chip cookie was born. I'll admit that I was a bit skeptical, and I mean, who wouldn't be? I was basically replacing a whole grain with a nut. I've replaced flour with legumes with great success, but never with a nut. UNTIL NOW.

When these bad boys came out of the oven, I swear my downstairs neighbors must have thought that I had a special friend over because of my reaction of ecstasy! "Ohhh my Godddd! Soooo good!!!" may have slipped off my tongue a few times. You have no idea. If you like chocolate and nuts together, you are in for a real treat, my dear.

Also, because these do not contain any flour, they're gluten-free. They also have fewer carbs than traditional chocolate chip cookies, being that they're not made with real flour. It is only fair to offer you this warning, though: Almond meal does contain significantly more fat that traditional flour. But fear not, young skeptic. The fat content is mainly comprised of monounsaturated fatty acids (MUFAs), which are actually good for you. They can help lower cholesterol, and when you replace empty calories with MUFA calories, you may actually lose weight. GTFO, I know! For those of you who would like it in layman's terms, it's full of good fat.

So without further ado, I present the gluten-free, super MUFA-powered chocolate chip cookie!

Ingredients:
3 cups almond meal
1 stick unsalted butter
2 eggs
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla
shake of cinnamon (per usual)
chocolate chips as you see fit (chocolate chips are also a MUFA food)

Method:
1. Preheat oven to 375'.

2. In a large bowl, combine butter, eggs, brown sugar, and vanilla. Beat until nice and fluffy.

3. Mix dry ingredients. Give it a good stir and scrape down the sides with a spatula.

4. Add chocolate chips and mix.

5. Drop by rounded tablespoons onto an ungreased cookie sheet. You should get about 3 dozen.

6. Bake for 10-12 minutes.

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Monday, January 7, 2013

Shortbread

Shawwwwtay! No? Okay, then forget it, you humorless lump. Go ahead and make your old boring shortbread and I'll make it my way- the fun way. Just don't call asking for advice on increasing the probability of shortbread success.

As I mentioned when I first started blogging, I enjoy making and creating recipes from ingredients that I have at home. I don't like having to go out of my way to purchase a two-pound bag of weird crap that I'll use only once. With this philosophy in mind, my quest for the ultimate shortbread recipe was not tremendously difficult, but it did prove to be a bit search-intensive due to the fact that many recipes call for rice flour or something else that I don't typically have on my shelves. I sat in agony for days, crying out loud, "Dear God, will I EVER be able to make shortbread?!"

Yes. The answer is absolutely yes! And you won't have to use anything you don't already have in your cucina. Or at least I would hope you have flour, sugar, butter, and lemon extract laying around. I mean, they ARE staples.  Ugh, now I've gone and offended you again, huh? Wah, wah, wah...

Ingredients:
1 stick unsalted butter
2 cups flour
2/3 cup sugar
splash of lemon extract
sugar for sprinkling

Method:
1. Preheat oven to 350'.

2. Cream butter and sugar together until the mixture becomes light and fluffy. Mix in your lemon extract. I suppose I used a quarter of a teaspoon, but I didn't really measure. All I know is that they turned out fabulous.

3. Mix in flour. Give it a good stir, why don't you.

4. Form the dough into teaspoon-sized balls and place on an ungreased cookie sheet. In the center of each cookie, press your thumb down slightly.

5. Sprinkle with sugar, if desired. I would recommend doing this. You don't want to be boring, now do you?

6. Bake for about 12 minutes.

7. Obtain a gym membership because these might cause you to gain weight should you decide to eat the whole batch (speaking from experience). Pin It

Cinna-licious Chocolate Bar Cookies

I've been on a blogging hiatus for a while, but I'm back, biotches. I don't know if you're crying tears of joy or agony, but either way, I'm glad you're expressing some sort of emotion on the subject! So with that in mind, I've been a sort of emotional wreck lately, and the only solace I can seem to find is in baking.


That's how I came to whip up this bitchin' batch of bar cookies that will certainly leave your tastebuds longing for more. It's likely that you'll also provoke me to be sad more often so that I'll deliver more tasty recipes. If this is the case, kindly remove yourself from my social circle. Otherwise, please feel free to send me lavish gifts as a token of gratitude.

So one of my favorite flavor combinations  is cinnamon and chocolate. I don't know why, but whenever these flavors share a recipe, the results are amazing. This is true 100% of the time, especially in the case of hot cocoa. I shall also tell you that these are NOT blondies. So far, I have remained anti-blondie throughout the course of my life due to the fact that I loathe butterscotch, especially in chip form. Traditional blondies are merely a cop out for people who can't bake, but would like to give off the appearance of  having spent hours in the kitchen. Here's why: All that sugar shocks your nerves and the human body doesn't know what to think. So, it says, "Oh, sugar! It must be delicious!" And before you know it, you have a band of loyal followers banging down the kitchen door of some poor schmuck who can't bake for crap. Oh, was that mean? Oh well.

Ingredients:
1 stick unsalted butter
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
scant 1/2 tsp salt
1 cup light brown sugar
1 egg
1 egg yolk
1 tsp cinnamon
1 cup chocolate chips (Use Ghiradelli!)

Method:
1. Preheat oven to 350'.

2. Grease a square baking dish. I prefer glass.

3. Melt butter and brown sugar together over a low flame. Stir constantly. Once the sugar is melted in, wait ten minutes.

4. Beat in egg and yolk.

4. Mix in cinnamon, salt, and baking powder.

5. Add flour. Once the flour is well incorporated, stir in the chocolate chips. Dip your finger in and lick the scrumptious batter off. Oh la la.

6. Pour the batter into the baking dish and pop that bad boy into the oven and let it bake for about 25 minutes.

7. Allow to cool completely before slicing into 16 squares.


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Sunday, September 30, 2012

Holy Moly Macaroons!

When it comes to sweets, there are a few things that I just can't get enough of. In no particular order, those things include coconut, chocolate, hazelnut, pumpkin, and maybe another thing or two that I can't recall at the moment, as it is nine o'clock at night and my mind is full of cotton balls. True story.  So anyway, I was asked to come up with a dessert that would complement a lemon meringue pie and the first thing that came to mind was coconut. Being that I knew I simply wouldn't have oodles of time to dedicate to baking, I made the impeccable decision to whip up a batch of macaroons. Excellent decision.

It took all of nine minutes to get my cookie "batter" from the cabinet to the oven, eighteen minutes to make the coconut puffies, and maybe ten minutes to cool. What's more, however, is that in addition to taking barely any time at all, they tasted awesome. And I mean awesome.

So if you have thirty-seven minutes to spare, I say give these a try. They're supremely easy and are guaranteed to knock your socks off in terms of taste.

Ingredients
1 2/3 cups shredded coconut
2/3 cup white sugar
1/4 cup white flour
1/4 tsp salt
4 egg whites
1 tsp vanilla

Method:
1. Set your time and ready, set, go!

2. Preheat oven to 325'. 

3. Combine coconut, sugar, flour, and salt. Give it a good stir.

4. In a small dish gently mix the vanilla and the egg white together. Do this for about ten seconds, which should be just enough time to break up the rather gelatinous albumen-containing slime. 

5. Drop by rounded tablespoons onto a prepared cookie sheet. You should get about 30.

 6. Bake for 18-20 minutes.


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Monday, July 30, 2012

Best Ever Chocolate Chip Cookies

I have experienced my fair share of chocolate chip cookie disasters, but after years of searching, I finally found (and perfected) one that never, ever fails. For all you die hard Tollhouse fans... forget about it. That "classic recipe" produces cookies that don't always rise,  sometimes spread too far, and get oddly crispy for no apparent reason. My spectacularly delicioso recipe always cranks out flavorful delights that puff up in the oven, and after they've been out of the blasted heat box for about 45 seconds, fall just enough to form sugary-chocolate valleys of goodness. Yum... they're chewy, moist, and have amazing texture.They spread just enough to look normal, but never get flat. You all know what I'm talking about... we've all opened the oven after 8 minutes, expecting to see golden pillows with gorgeous glowing chunks of chocolate, but instead see this ridiculous mess of nearly transparent, paper thin cookie dough with chocolate chips standing fully erect. That's when the tears start flowing and the swear jar begins to overflow with 20's.

NO MORE. The recipe I am about to present will never leave you swearing off baking ever again. In fact, you might even gain a few pounds because you'll be making these SO often. For real. Let's get started.

Ingredients:
2 1/4 cup white flour (I know... no whole wheat!)
3/4 cup packed light brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp baking soda
1 package instant vanilla pudding (Do not buy sugar free unless you like things that taste disgusting)
1 tbsp vanilla extract (this is not a typo. TBSP)
1 bag chocolate chips (I always use Ghiradelli. Go big or go home, right?)
2 sticks unsalted butter, softened, NOT melted (I usually use cold butter and mash it with a fork, but you don't have to do that... just don't use melted butter)

Method:
1. Strap on your jazziest apron.

2. Preheat oven to 375'.

3. Combine butter, eggs, vanilla, white sugar, and brown sugar. Mix until all ingredients are fully incorporated.

4. Add pudding mix to sugar-y egg mixture. Now add baking soda. Mix like Hell.

5. Slowly add flour. Once all flour has been mixed in, add chocolate chips.

6. Drop by spoon fulls onto UNGREASED cookie sheets. You should get about four dozen.

7. Bake for 8-10 minutes.

8. Brag to all your friends about how you make a bangin' chocolate chip cookie that puts their beloved Nestle recipe to shame. Pin It